Viva la Résistance!

We've all been there. Boy meets boy. Boy falls head over heels for boy, and is pretty sure the same is true in reverse. Boy realises tragic flaw in boy. The tragic flaw consumes the entire relationship and boy can no longer play the game. Boy dumps boy, wondering if the other boy was just as head over heels for him…It's called Shakespearean tragedy with a homo twist.

Though my relationship with JD had, at least in my mind, substantially ended quite a while ago, old flames were somewhat fanned when he announced he was visiting London for a few days to see 'a sick uncle'. I wasn't entirely sure meeting him was a good idea, but he insisted that it would be a good thing and I was after all curious as to whatever happened between us.

In typical neo-JD fashion (neo as in post-turning-into-a-freak-I-don’t-even-recognise JD), he came and went, failing to ever make enough effort to realise that dinner. And the thing is, before he said he was coming, I was fine. Things were moving on. I'd met Superman (ok, he just looks like superman because he has an amazing jaw-line and Scottish features - and ever since I met him that Mandy/Booka Shade track "Superman" has been playing in my head!) a few weeks back and along with another couple of friends-with-favours, things looked like they were on the up. But in those three days JD spent here, messaging but never committing, begging but never promising, I was gradually consumed with enough anger to burn a whole through the ground beneath me. The day he was leaving London, I sent him a message asking him to kindly delete all of my contact details and not to ever fucking dare so much as think about calling (add a few more four letter words in there). Predictably, he messaged back expressing hurt and confusion, but he will have to try a lot harder than that to get a response from me.

So Viva la Résistance! Taking the lead from my homegirl Oprah who first debuted the "He's Just Not That Into You" book into our dating lives, I moved ON.

But herein lies the danger. Though I technically dumped him, the reality was that he constructively dumped me because he left me no choice. I was dumped indirectly. I've never been dumped before, but thankfully have seen enough of it around me to gather a little intelligence to help me navigate the aftermath. And it is an abyss.
Attention. That’s what you always need when you've been dumped. You need to know that people still want you, that you still matter, that you have prospects and won't be alone forever. Now I know that sounds silly, but its true. As noted, I had seen this around me several times, and I did everything but strap my hands together to stop me from dialling exes or fuck buddies from times past.

And my friend P Bear was right; the only way to get over a man is to get under one. Just always make sure it's not something you'll regret.

So I put it all behind me with speed I'm even surprised I could muster. That same day (last Friday) I sent the text message I was in Soho for a birthday, and out of nowhere I met a stunning guy from San Francisco. It was perfect, he was gone on Monday, and he was looking for some fun and someone to have dinner with. I happily obliged, also knowing that I will be in San Francisco next month and will probably need similar treatment.

And when it rains it fucking pours. Remember Kyril from my New Years Chronicles? Out of nowhere I get a message from him, asking if I was in London over Easter, and whether I would be interested in having coffee with him. Superman leaves me a heart-felt voice message on the phone that evening (I told him about the situation with JD, and he is doing his 'best to give me some space).

So I've decided this is a lot like the France in the 18th century. Was JD the equivalent of Louis XVI? Did I lead my own résistance movement to rid myself of the tyrant? No, I think JS, my previous partner of 3 years, was Louis XVI. Once I'd ousted him, JD came in as Robespierre with promises of freedom that turned into a Reign of Terror. If my love life follows the analogy of the French Revolution, I'm bound to have a Napoleon very soon. I just hope this one is taller and has a bigger penis.